8 Asma' 166 B.E. (Baha'i Calendar)
Drumbeat in my head:  Cocteau Twins, "Know Who You Are At Every Age"

Friday after work, friends are going to pick me up and take me up to Green Lake, WI for the 50th Annual Green Lake Baha'i Conference. 

Baha'is in my area refer to the event as simply "Green Lake" and I heard them talking about it frequently even before I became a Baha'i.  I first started going to the Baha'i center for Sunday devotions two years ago this month, and I remember one Sunday there was almost no one at the center because of this conference.  I was interested in going to the conference last year, but I was too busy packing for the move to my current co-op house.

So this is my first Green Lake Baha'i Conference. I'm really looking forward to it.  And it hits me at an interesting phase of my faith.

I will have been a Baha'i two years this coming November.  This time two years ago I was exploring the Baha'i Faith, trying to decide if it was a good fit for me.  As my faith in my previous spiritual path of Mahikari was crumbling, I was reading the book "Baha'u'llah and the New Era" for the first time in nearly two decades and reading anything else about the Faith that I could get my hands on.  It was an exciting time, and as I felt myself spiritually changing, my prayers became deeper and more sincere.

Two years later, I am hosting a devotional gathering at my house every Friday night, even though average attendance right now is two people.  Sunday morning I have a ritual where I go to the devotions at the Baha'i Center, and spend some time at the nearby Washington Hotel Coffee Room journal-writing and reflecting. 

I like these rituals and am glad I can be of service in this way, but right now, I can't say that I'm on fire for the Baha'i Faith.  Not that I have any objection to the Baha'i Faith either--I see very little of the cult-like behavior that ultimately caused me to leave Mahikari.  But I ask myself just how central of a role the Baha'i Faith should be playing in my life.

There's more I could write about this, but I think I'll stop here. Hopefully some clarity regarding this will come to me at this weekend's conference...